Directed by: Robert Zemeckis
Starring: Anthony Hopkins, Angelina Jolie, Crispin Glover, Robin Wright Penn, Ray Winstone, Brendan Gleeson, John Malkovich, Alison Lohman
Rating: PG-13

Ray Winstone and Anthony Hopkins in Beowulf. (Courtesy photo)

Every story has its ideal medium in which to be told. The question thus far has been whether there is any story that is best told in fully animated motion capture. Beowulf is the latest attempt to answer that question, and it does to a degree. Any live-action attempt to adapt the 11th-century poem into a film would have been a very tall order. And animated films geared toward adults have found little success. But in the case of Beowulf, the format offers stars and spectacle. Want Angelina Jolie to transform from a golden water demon into, well, Angelina Jolie? Done. Want the acting chops and strong voice of Ray Winstone grafted onto a 6th-century Danish bodybuilder? You got it. Director Robert Zemeckis has teamed with writers Neil Gaiman (Stardust) and Roger Avery (Rules of Attraction) to adapt the epic poem into a driving narrative. In doing so, they veer somewhat wildly—though not unwisely—from the original plot. The stilted dialogue is frustrating, considering the liberties in plot. But the acting is pretty good. And the motion capture? Have they improved on the walking-dead looks of The Polar Express, or the notorious Final Fantasy? A little, but not enough. The eyes are still mostly lifeless. And just as the eyes are the windows to the soul, they also tend to be the windows into giving a hoot.

And as if motion capture weren’t enough of a distraction, Beowulf can also be seen in 3-D. That’s how we saw it. I tend to think 3-D is a great idea, as long as the movie isn’t too good. If you’re really drawn into a story, you don’t want to be bothered by spears flying off the screen. Beowulf isn’t too good, so the 3-D is welcome. What’s surprising is that for such a dreary, grotesquely violent tale, Beowulf is pretty entertaining. Spectacle is nearly the only positive, not unlike last winter’s insane 300. But in this case, with Zemeckis steering things along at a mostly energetic pace, Beowulf holds together. And in the slow moments, there are always those creepy life-like faces to look at. They haven’t figured out the eyes, but they can expertly place little white furs on the end of Beowulf’s nose.

King Hrothgar (Anthony Hopkins in motion capture’s first fat suit) and his subjects revel in his famous mead hall, Heorot, until the noise lures the monstrous Grendel (Crispin Glover) from his mountain cave. The beast destroys Heorot, but doesn’t touch the King. This is not lost on the King’s miserable Queen, Wealthow (Robin Wright Penn). Hrothgar calls for a hero to vanquish Grendel, and Beowulf (Ray Winstone) answers the call. Along with Wiglaf (Brendan Gleeson) and 14 warriors, Beowulf battles Grendel inside Heorot. But while Grendel likes to tear men in two and chew on their heads, he isn’t even the toughest demon in the neighborhood. That would be his mother.

Zemeckis and his animators create a dark Scandinavian world in which a few demons still exist. It is a marvelous setting for this story. And often the images transport us. But Zemeckis allows himself so much free license that soon every law of physics has been broken in the name of action. It’s no longer a tale out of some murky history, but pure fantasy. That makes it much harder to maintain tension. And without more accessible characters, staying engaged becomes a task. Zemeckis, Gaiman, and Avery deserve credit for taking a story that has no business being filmed and adapting it with a good sense of mythological storytelling. But do you know how to write dialogue for 1,500-year-old Danes? I don’t.

However, it might have helped if the actors’ accents were more consistent. Hopkins, Winstone and Gleeson speak in their standard accents—London for Winstone, Wales for Hopkins, Ireland for Gleeson. Robin Wright-Penn seems to be trying a slight Danish accent. Crispin Glover and Angelina Jolie go heavy on the Danish, which seems the most effective. John Malkovich, who plays Hrothgar’s ignoble advisor Unferth, uses a voice that is beyond description. Strangest of all may be American Alison Lohman, who plays young Ursula with some kind of Irish trill. Nobody gives a bad performance, though Malkovich is weird at best. But all the actors must fight their cadaverous selves. The animators do come up with many fine touches, but they come and go. It’s as if a light keeps turning on and off somewhere behind those eyes.

I can’t deny that I enjoyed Beowulf almost from start to finish, if for no other reason than that my expectations were low to begin with. If you think you’ll enjoy the spectacle, then find an IMAX screen projecting it in 3-D. All others, beware.

Alex Manugian lives in Sherman Oaks, California, and works for the Cartoon Network. He grew up in Groton and has reviewed movies for Harvard residents for many years.